Guess What? It’s HOT!

Summers in the South…well they’re hot and they’re humid. They are sticky; they are draining; they are saturating; they are smothering (worse than your Aunt Matilda's Christmas hug!). Did I mention that they're HOT…and HUMID! I’m sure that many of you have seen or experienced the extreme heat wave we seem to be having nationwide. Now, I haven’t studied up on this, so I can’t actually make such a statement as “record-breaking”, but, guys, IT’S HOT! Most days are hovering around the upper 90's. But we’ve seen numbers like 103 with heat indices of 115. Yes, I know that those numbers may be relatively common for people living in say, Arizona, California (shout out!), Hades, etc. But, there’s one thing we have here that certain areas of our nation don't seem to complain about – HUMIDITY! It’s just one of those things that you can’t explain – you just have to experience it to understand it!
For a month or two now, we have had a number of fellas working on a roof project (yes, I am going somewhere with this!). After seeing 2 or 3 companies walk off the job, we discovered the reason. Their complaint – the heat! They said there was no way they could stand the heat and humidity – that they had never experienced anything like it and simply couldn’t finish. Needless to say, one group finally came riding in on a white horse (named Dodge!) and saved the day. They claimed the same thing…never had they experienced this kind of weather. But…they were the only ones who stayed and completed the job. So kudos to them!! And thank you very much, gentlemen. Sorry that it was such a miserable job, but we appreciate it all the more!
Let me try to explain, for those of you who may have never known such an experience, what a hot, humid, Southern summer day is like. You have the heat, it’s quite hot, actually very hot. There’s no wind, no breeze (and you thank God if you’re walking down the sidewalk and someone opens a business door and you feel a bit of air! Might even duck in for a minute or two and pretend to look around! No - not me - never done that, myself!). So you walk out of your front door at 7:00 AM, and are hit in the face, instantaneously, with a wall of heat. OK, let’s say you walk outside and you feel the heat hit you in the face at the same time someone takes a steaming hot blanket and throws it onto you and drenches your hair, your face, and your clothes and you have to carry that sopping blanket around all day – THAT’S SUMMER IN THE SOUTH!
As much as this sounds like a complaint, it isn’t. I am thankful for the days I spent running around as a child in my neighborhood, playing while carrying around my sopping wet blanket, too stupid to go inside and cool off, listening to my father's perverbial warning, "Stay in or stay out!". So we stayed out until we had to come inside because we were all the shade of lobsters, hair glued into Ed Grimly position by the perspiritory wipings of the brow. And there was always that neighborhood kid that had a pool, but never invited anyone over! Yeah, thanks, dude. That's why you never knew where our secret clubhouse was! Then, FINALLY, someone's mom would always pull out the POPCICLES!! Thanks, MOM!
I guess everyone has something about the area in which they live that they either love or hate - something that makes the place endearing. I don’t hate the heat, but it would be nice if it would cool off just a bit. Maybe I'll stick my head in the FIRDGE for a while! Maybe pass out some POPCICLES! WANT ONE? I call grape!